Hey there world, it’s been a minute! I am a week and a half into a BADLY NEEDED two week break from teaching, and this is the first time that I have felt like I had the energy to do any writing. I’ll get to those beautiful and delicious millionaire shortbread cookies above, but I’d like to reflect on my year a little, and talk about my new year’s resolutions!
Lots of people don’t really believe in New Year’s resolutions, and I totally get it. Completely changing your life just because a number changes on the calendar isn’t realistic. I also really admire people that are able to achieve things slowly just through focus on personal growth, but that isn’t really my jam. I’m slightly competitive (Mom, I can see you rolling your eyes at that) and I’ve always done a lot better with goals and benchmarks. So, New Year’s resolutions are something that I sometimes make and get into. One year I decided not to buy any new clothes or shoes after embarking on a semi-destructive personal relationship with so many Lularoe clothes and lots and lots of Toms shoes 😉 . A few years I set goals to train for and run half marathons. So. Here we go. If you aren’t interested and want to get to the flour and butter, feel free to skip halfway down.
- The most boring resolution that no one wants to read or think about: make healthier choices and lose a few.
I’m getting married. I want to feel as good as I can that day. This resolution is boring and deserves no more of anyone’s attention.
2. Perform more!
I used to do a lot of acting in musicals, and I’d really like to do some more. It is something that I’ve given up in the last two years because I was adjusting to my new job, but I’d really like to get back to it! I’m coming for you, Indy community theater scene.
3. Establish better work-life balance.
I am in my seventh year of teaching and in my second year at a new job as a competitive show choir director at a much bigger high school. I’m not going to lie to you, it is really hard. Like most teachers, I really find it difficult to do anything having to do with my job halfway…. I either want to do it as well as I can or I don’t do it. Also like most teachers, I have a lot of difficulty clocking out mentally. It is hard for me to leave school at school and focus on myself or my friends and family at home. This particular job also involves a lot of after-school hours, and this school year, it has been taking a toll on me. I have been feeling overworked, overwhelmed, and a little burnt out. It is hard to admit that and to write it down, but that’s the truth. I didn’t really figure out that I was feeling this way until very close to the end of the semester, but now that I have been recharging on this winter break, I have been able to acknowledge that it is happening and that I need to change something. How am I going to accomplish this? Still working on that. I’m going to fight hard for a second choir director for my program, something that I think is long overdue. I’m going to remove my work email from my phone. I’m going to try to do more of the things that I like to do outside of work, like baking and yoga. If anybody has the magic answer to this one, let me know, because I’ve been struggling.
Another factor on this issue is that I thought I had made it past the hardest part of teaching…. the first five years. I thought I was safe from the burnout that that so many teachers experience early in their careers. Year seven! I had made it! Having a tough time now makes me feel like a failure. I know that’s irrational, but I can’t stop myself from that particular thought spiral.
HOWEVER, I am not going to give in to doom and gloom on this. There are so many things I love about my job, and it makes me feel like I’m making a difference. I’m a good teacher. And I am hopeful that this is a just a season in my life that will pass. I am choosing to look at this as an opportunity for reflection and growth…. If I can conquer this and establish more balance in my life, I know I will feel better in so many ways.
While I’m reflecting a little here, I must say that 2019 was so kind to me in so many beautiful ways. I made a ton of beautiful music, I got engaged, I spent time with people that I love, I discovered a love of Disney World, I got to enjoy time living in a city that I really find beautiful and exciting, I worked with amazing colleagues, I got to be a part of the education of so many awesome young people, I ate yummy food, and so much more. Here’s to many more good times in the new decade!
Ok that was deep and personal, sorry. Back to business, brought to you by my queen, Mary Berry. I got this new book for Christmas from my man-friend, and it is pretty awesome.
I wanted something quick and easy to take to holiday parties, and I also wanted to try some new techniques, and Millionaire Shortbread totally fit the bill. It also made me feel cool because they make that all the time on the Great British Bake-Off. If I made this, I would be one step closer to becoming Paul Hollywood. Or something. I opened up the recipe, took out a fork to attack the huge German chocolate cake I had leftover from school, and poured some wine. (The cake was super good and super easy and came from the Grandbaby Cakes recipe book I’ve talked about in other posts, FYI).
The wine is a crucial part of this recipe. Actually most recipes. Do not omit this step.
Actual step one: the shortbread.
Shortbread is just so British. Incredibly simple, easy to get a little wrong, and utterly delicious. It’s mostly butter of course, with a little flour and sugar. I pressed it into a baking dish lined with parchment paper and baked for a bit until lightly golden. Careful not to overmix shortbread, or it will get tough. You don’t want gluten to develop, you want to keep the texture short and crumbly. While the cookie base was baking, I turned my attention to the scariest step, the caramel.
I’m not usually good with things that require lots of stirring and monitoring (see my various disastrous experiences melting chocolate), so I was frankly shocked that I focused well enough that this didn’t take me more than one try. I heated up sugar, sweetened condensed milk, butter, and corn syrup, brought it to a boil, and then just stirred and watched it until it turned a pretty caramel color. I scared the cat with the loud YAAAASSSS that I let escape when I figured out that it was working. After setting it aside to cool a little, I poured it over the shortbread and left it to set up. This sort of caramel does not set all the way, it stays pretty gooey and sticky and messy, which is what makes it good.
Last layer, my old nemesis: chocolate. However, I’ve gotten a lot better at this and it was really fine. Double boiler, spatula and heatproof bowl, boom.
I just let it set up and cut it into squares, but it would be really easy to class this up a little. You could add lines of melted white chocolate, and then drag a toothpick through it to add feathers, or you could add some edible glitter to be extra schmancy. You could cut the edges off to make them look cleaner, but hey, that part tastes good too. Just leave it and call them rustic.
Mary Berry never disappoints. They were easy and delicious. I highly recommend this book, it is filled with tons of recipes that use pantry ingredients, take very little time, and the truly valuable asset in any recipe, dirty very few dishes.
I hope you all had a holiday season as filled with love and laughter as mine was.
Let’s all choose joy in 2020.
